Becoming Fearless

In July of 2023, I was asked to speak at the FMWF Chamber Women’s Connect Event. My topic was on fear. It’s one I’m deeply connected to, which isn’t something that I am necessarily proud of, but I’m also not ashamed of it. This idea of doing life scared and building confidence is one that has been intertwined in my experiences professionally and personally.

Photo Credit: Fargo Moorhead West Fargo Chamber of Commerce

Fear has gripped me for most of my life. I can trace back interpretations of my experiences as a child or events in my life that triggered this fear. While the origin story may not matter as much, the reality is that what I did to overcome is what I’m sharing today.

In 2016, I took a whole year to do the things that terrified me. I wanted to be done with fear, once and for all. Additionally, I was working for an organization where my job was to publicly speak about the work our nonprofit was doing. It frustrated me that my boss was ‘forcing’ me to speak from a podium. The truth was that it was part of my job requirement and he saw something in me that I didn’t see in myself.

It took an entire year of practicing public speaking, hyperventilating, crying, and then doing it again. Scared.

That year, not only did I do work ‘scared.’ I did my personal life scared. I decided that I would force myself to go be quiet, write, journal and teach myself through repetition how to quiet myself and learn the practice of peace. Inherently, I knew that if I could learn and practice these principles, I would be able to rewire my brain and build the practice of courage. Things I did outside the walls of my work included: hiking, camping, traveling and staying places alone. The fear of being alone was impacting my confidence at home and at work, so I became ruthless in my choices of forcing my brain to change.

What happened after that year surprised me. All the little steps in doing it scared brought me to say yes to an international humanitarian project in the Middle East. The practice of learning courage never felt ‘courageous’.

Admittedly, there were times that I was scared. It was in learning how to overcome that fear that my personal confidence was built. It was practicing courage when I wanted to run and hide that brought some of the most amazing experiences to my personal and professional life.

This is why I’m so passionate about helping women overcome their fears of failure, their anxieties of inadequacy and build an authentic community where we can do life scared. Together.